Today marks 4 years of marriage for us. I can't even believe it! As I ponder on the last 4 years of life together I am amazed at what we've faced together.
The first year was a breeze. Our adjusting to each other came rather easily, other than the fact that you still insist on leaving your cereal bowl in the left side of the sink when you know it drives me mad. I still love you. And will move it to the right side as I just shake my head and laugh.
The second year we moved to New Hampshire. That was a tough year. We got pregnant, we miscarried and I went through a bout of deep depression. You stuck by my side. Watched way too many series on Netflix with me and comforted me when I cried for hours. I probably needed medical help to deal with my emotions, but you took care of me the best you could and we made it past that rough patch.
Our third year we finished up school in New Hampshire and moved back to Utah. You started work for a real estate company the week after we got back and I got pregnant again. We both worked all summer and fall and we had Scout in December of 2014. .
Our fourth year we moved to Arizona so you could start Law School. It was difficult to adjust to the new schedule, but overall not too bad. I got pregnant with Hawk when Scout was 6 months old and that threw us for a bit of a loop. It was tough dealing with a baby turning toddler while I was carrying our second child but I wouldn't change it for the world. Hawk was born on a week before your finals which also made threw us for a loop. Newborns and sleep are not synonymous, and we both struggled. We finally had a heart to heart about our marriage and discussed how we both felt under appreciated. After accepting that we both do a lot for the family and we had our separate responsibilities, neither of which were more/less important than the other, we were able to grow together and move on. Our marriage has never been better. Sometimes those hard talks are the ones that make the biggest difference.
The day we married I don't think I really loved you. I liked you. So so much. But I don't really know that I knew how to love you, nor do I think you knew how to love me. As we've struggled and enjoyed these last 4 years together I think we truly have learned to love each other. I see the way you love me as you get out of bed in the morning and go to your externship because it has potential to improve our lives in the future. I see the way you love me as you come home from work and take the kids off my hands so I can finish dinner. I see the way you love me as you thank me for the frozen pizza I threw in the oven and on our plates and called it dinner because that's all I could manage that day. I see the way you love me as you bring me home a fountain soda from the gas station even though you don't really approve of my soda habit. I see the way you love me as you offer to clean up the kitchen and put the kids to bed so I can sit down for a few minutes. I see the way you love me when you offer to wake up with me at 6am and work out together because you know I don't like doing it alone. I see the way you love me when we study about God together and kneel in prayer together.
There is so much more I can add to this list, but the point is that love develops throughout a marriage. You learn to love your spouse through sacrifice. Through putting their needs before your own because when they're happy, you are happy.
I can't begin to tell you how grateful I am that you picked me. That together we were sealed in a Temple of God for time and all Eternity. That we get to face this life and the next together. I hope as the years continue to progress, our love will also. You are, and forever will be the man of my dreams. The man I choose to love and give my whole heart to.
Happy Anniversary!
Love always,
C
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